japan

Big announcement!

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Basically this whole year we have been working towards fulfilling a dream we’ve had since we were kids (those of us who were around back then, anyway): visiting Japan.

And now, our dream is about to come true! In fact, we will be staying at a host fanily from october to january while studying Japanese at a school! We will be living in Fukuoka, but hopefully we’ll visit many different cities in both Japan and possibly China and Korea.

Needless to say, we are all very excited! Basically everyone of us really want to do this, so it has been the main motivator for us all to work on our issues, both individually and as a system. Naturally, it’ll be a huge challenge for all of us but I’m sure we can do this!

I still have a hard time believing it, considering where we’ve been.. A few years ago, just the thought of leaving our room could make us cry and panic, using public transportation would lead to so much anxiety.. We had no proper diagnosis despite having spent years and years as a patient at a mental health clinic. No one understood, no one saw what was going on.
There was a time when Nemo would come out almost every night and cry so hard he could barely breathe. Or he would get triggered out and be so anxious he couldn’t move for hours by someone simply raising their voice. We have had saboteur alters hurting us and before that years of confusion and doubt and depression. Not the mention all the abuse..
Last year we were in hospital three times because of mental health issues..

It’s been a long time coming, and we have all worked so hard to get to this point.. And here we are, about to go on the adventure of our lives, and I feel.. Ready. I think we are ready ๐Ÿ™‚

Hope you are all doing great!
/ Mimi and RP

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Feeling better and working on making dreams come true

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Hey everyone!

I’m feeling better today, probably because of my lovely boyfriend. He just has a way of hugging away my sorrows. Cuddling FTW.

Two things have dawned on me:

1. I have probably misjudged Wynn. I’ve always seen her as a little bundle of joy but now I believe that she feels down sometimes too. Usually when thinking about mistreated animals or deceased pets. This also goes for stuffed animals, she can’t bear the thought of stuffies being alone in the dark.

2. The person I become when I’m very sad or pissed of (mentioned this in my last post) might be a more intense, lively version of the angry man. I’ve heard that people with DID often have a animate “fantasy world” or “inner world”, in which the alters might live when they aren’t out. I’m thinking that this “far, far away” feeling probably is classic dissociation and that I kind of enter/get sucked into the angry mans world? Or, it could be his brother or something because I really do feel like they are related somehow.

Anyway, on a more positive note: I’m currently working on making one of my oldest dreams come true, namely learning Japanese! I’ve been meaning to do that since I was like 10 years old, but I’ve never gotten around to it due to social anxiety and stuff.
I am so excited, can’t wait to get started! ๐Ÿ˜€ I’ve also always dreamed about visiting Japan, the culture and nature is just so appealing to me. Ihh, so excited ๐Ÿ™‚