Every now and then these debates on whether treating alters like seperate people is encouraging sufferers of DID/DDNOS to “stay sick” or not. I thought I’d share my thoughts on it.
Delusions or “false beliefs” play a big part in many mental illnesses. A depressed person might think that things will never get better (it probably will), a paranoid person believes that someone is after them (which is quite unlikely), people who suffer from social anxiety might feel like everyone is staring at them (they probably aren’t), someone who suffers from compulsions might believe that “if I don’t do *this* *insert something horrible here* will happen” (it most likely won’t) and so on. If someone close to the sufferer was to play along with these fears, it would obviously make everything worse. Can’t argue with that, right?
Now, the thing about multiplicity is that isn’t a false belief or a delusion. On the contrary, a DID/DDNOS diagnosis is a confirmation that what you are experiencing actually is real and that your alters really do exist. Other peoples opinions on the matter does not change the fact that your alters actually are there. Because that is what this disorder is all about, right? Having two or more distinct personalities taking control over the body is the very “definition” of multiplicity. From my point of view, treating alters like seperate people is just acknowleding and respecting the fact that this condition is real and that they are real. If you, on the other hand, were to treat us as one person and start blaming me for things my alters have said or done, being pissed at me for constantly changing, accusing me of faking or attention seeking, forcing me to hide my alters and being unsupportive, that would be making things worse for me. That would feed my depression and anxiety. That would make my conditon a bigger problem than it has to be.
What you should do is respect my decision to work towards integration or cooperation and support me on my way towards whatever goal I choose. What you should do is respect my wishes on how I want you to approach me, my condition and my alters.
This is just my personal opinion, feel free to disagree but do it respectfully and constructively. Oh and forgive me for any misspelled words and stuff, I’m tired.