I’ve been good

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I’ve been very productive this weekend, I finished pretty much everything I intended to, which was a lot. It feels good, not great, I still haven’t reached a point where I can feel great about myself or be very proud, but that’s okay. Feeling good is an achievement too, and it’s enough for now. I even rewarded myself, which is basically a first. I got this kit with sparkly shower gel + body oil, liquid soap + hand lotion and lip balm for Christmas, and they are all cocoa and orange-scented. Today I allowed myself to take a long nice shower and use these products, and I really tried to focus on how soft they felt on my skin and how delicious they smelled (seriously though, they smell like chocolate).  

Self-care is new for me, but I want to make it a regular thing. I don’t like myself, and previously I always thought that thought and emotions need to come before actions, but now I want to try doing it the other way around. I’m thinking that maybe if I treat myself more kindly, I can learn to like myself, because honestly, if I was to wait with being good to myself until I like myself, I’d have to wait a very long time. 

I sincerely hope you are all doing great, and that you’ll feel better soon if you aren’t. Stay safe and love a lot, everyone. I need to shut up now before Phemie rips my head off for being so sentimental.

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