[Trigger warning: brief mention of ED and self-harm]
I had art therapy today, don’t know if it went well or not… The broken child was out and spent most of the time just standing there crying. Then something amazing happened: it started talking. Granted, it was through Phemie, but still, it communicated. And what’s really cool is that it didn’t even pretend to be me. It talked on its one behalf, which my alters rarely ever do. Not sure if the therapist understood that it was an alter speaking about itself, I’ve only met her twice and since the broken child spoke through Phemie, it sure didn’t sound like a child. It’s great that the broken child finally has started talking, I’m just afraid that all the emotions it’s kept inside will overwhelm me and make things worse for a while… I am scared of all the pain and grief that’s hidden away in the broken child.
So, I’ve already figured out that the broken child wants to starve the body so we will slowly fade away. What I learned today was that 1. it’s name is Nemo (means “nobody”, however, the broken child is still genderless) and 2. Nemo wants to hurt the body to kind of reenact the abuse we’ve been through. It wants the scars to represent the wounds and scars on the body to represent the wounds and scars inside of us that abusers and reinforcer’s of abuse have inflicted on us.